Now that I'm back home, I'm back "on program" and weighing and measuring every bite that goes into my mouth. When I was on vacation, I really enjoyed mealtimes. I had a light breakfast, sometimes skipped lunch, and was busy all day. Between the heat and my activity level, I just didn't feel particularly hungry. When it came time for dinner, I ate until I was full, and sometimes went back for seconds. I still lost weight, because I was physically active all day long. From sun up to sun down, I was playing with horses, walking around the property, or doing chores.
Back at home, though, I work at a desk job, and to be honest, I really hate to exercise. The stuff I like to do just isn't available here. There are no horses to ride or brush, and no interesting terrain to explore. After a full day of working at a desk, most days I'm too tired to exercise anyway. I have barely enough energy to get a load of wash into the washer or help the SO clean up after dinner.
We all know the diet math. If one wants to lose weight, calories in have to be less than calories out. That means, in this equation, that I have to eat less, since my activity level is much, much lower. It means pushing away from the table when I'm still hungry, and it means saying no to yummy favorites that I could consume while on vacation. I'm trying to still get some exercise, but there's no way I can continue on the level I was during vacation. There's the reality that I'm paid to spend eight or more hours each day sitting at a desk. There's no way around it.
While we were on vacation, my brother-in-law introduced me to a specialty beer. I really liked it, and each evening he and I would sit down and share a beer or two. This afternoon, my well-meaning SO found the same beer at our grocery store and offered me one. I had to turn it down. I just don't have the extra calories to spare. The SO was visibly hurt, thinking the beer would be a well-received treat and a reminder of our wonderful vacation. After my wounded SO left the room, I cried. I wanted the beer -- I really did -- but I just don't have the calories available.
Dieting and exercise were so much more fun on vacation. I didn't have to diet, and I didn't have to exercise. Instead, I was busy having fun, and I didn't have to think about what I was doing.
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i ended up eating some M&Ms my dad offered me on July 4. mainly bc he kept going into his goody bag...trying to find something i'd want. i didnt want to tell him i was "watching what i eat" so instead of turning down the offered mms (i'd turned chips, snickers, 5th avenues, ect). i ate them....the relationship with my dad has been rocky in the past...and we're turning a new leaf in our relationship....i think continuing to turn down his "peace offereings" would have done more damage to our budding relationship than to my body....if that makes sense.
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