Thursday, August 16, 2007

Fleeting Weight Loss

Yesterday's all-time low as all-too-fleeting as it disappeared from the scale almost as soon as it appeared. Fortunately, it's only 0.4 lbs away, so I can accept that. Truthfully, I look at 0.4 lbs as the possible weight of a really good crap, so I'm not taking this one personally.

I'm still kicking around the idea of going back on the Cambridge Diet again, though. Yeah, I know liquid diets aren't the greatest. Yeah, I know it's better to do it slowly by eating plenty of healthy food. Yeah, I know that your body will consume it's own protein if you don't get enough. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

But the truth is, I just want to see some dramatic movement. I have a friend coming back from Iraq in about four months, and I'd like my friend to see me and say, "Wow!" Even though I've lost close to 25 lbs so far, I don't think she would even notice. I think the honest truth is that I'm so fat nobody is going to notice until I am a lot thinner.

But it's not just that I want to impress the hell out of my friend when she returns. The truth is that I'm just starting to feel really tired of my body. I'm tired of those ubiquitous plastic stacking deck chairs being too small for my rear. I'm tired of having to lift up my stomach and breasts so I can wash underneath them. I'm tired of not being able to sleep on my stomach because it's so big I can't get comfortable. I'm tired of not being able to swim, because my overly-large ass floats on top of the water, which in turn forces my face under the water.

One isn't supposed to swim with your head lower than your ass. It's a good way to drown yourself.

But I also recall the parable of the jackrabbit and the tortoise. After all, it was the tortoise that won the race.

But I also realize that I'd like to be able to see my kitty again.

1 comment:

Lady T said...

lol...seeign one's kitty would be an accomplishment within itself....

i responded to your comment, though if dont check back, i'm posting it here too....

"oink, we do not 'sleep' together. we are abstaining. he has his home, i have mine, we spend the nite togther maybe once a week or so.

i would not go as far as to say that he "supports" me financially, he helps out on occasion, but there is nothing getting turned off if he does not "help"...what he offers is a bit more "breathing room"

marriage has been the topic of may a discussion...rings costs money, weddings costs money, and try as he might he can not convince me to do the "courthouse thing".

i know you're not picking....i appreciate all comments as they are usually eye opening...and of course i care too much what others think of me. this is something i see within myself, though often we see things that are not very easy to change.

being together is what i want. it does make me happy. and though i care a lot of what others think, in the end i always follow my own heart on the matter.