Tuesday, July 22, 2008

1,000 to 1,200 Calories

I've had a number of readers opine that 1,000 to 1,200 calories is too low for a man, and that I really should up my calorie intake.

I should only be so lucky. Unfortunately, I am in the unlucky 50% of the population who lacks a penis, so I am forever relegated to the lower end of the calorie spectrum.

Now I suspect revealing that little detail has caused a few recent readers to spit their coffee all over their monitors.

"But what about your references to 'The Wife?'" I hear them all crying.

Well long-time readers of my blog will realize that I used to call "The Wife" by the name "The SO." I changed her title around the end of June, when California legalized same-gender marriage, and we went out and got married. We've been together for almost ten years, and The Kid is a child that's been living with for the past two years. She's 12, and we are trying to adopt her from the foster care system.

But the fact that I'm female hasn't really been a secret. I think my post Here Kitty, Kitty, Kitty will clear up any misunderstandings in that area.

Now I'm sure I'll end up offending a few folks out there, but my blog really isn't about the fact that I'm queer. It's about the fact that I'm really overweight morbidly obese and I'm trying to work my way back to a normal-sized butt.

But hey, while we are on the subject, I probably should ask my California readers to vote NO on Proposition 8.

I know that the idea of a same-sex couple doing the mattress mambo gives many people the willies. However, this initiative isn't about sex. If you think about your boss and his wife doing the nasty, or your parents doing the Wild Thang, it probably gives you a bit of the squigglies as well.

This initiative is about protecting families -- families that already exist. Whether or not you support queer folks getting together in the first place, it's already a done deal. Equal rights or no, our families already exist. Voting in favor of banning same-sex marriage isn't going to stop couples from pairing up and having (or adopting) kids.

The only thing this initiative will do, if it is passed, is to prevent us from having the same rights as other families. If I die, my partner will have to pay inheritance taxes on all the property we've bought together. My kid will suffer because our home would have to be sold to pay those taxes. If one of us gets sick, and hospital staff decides to be stubborn, we might not be able to visit each other.

Imagine how that would feel to be told, "you can't visit your spouse in the hospital because your marriage is illegal," or "you are going to have to sell your home so you can pay the inheritance tax because your partner died."

And the truth is, domestic partnerships don't confer the same rights. They aren't recognized by the Federal government, and they aren't even recognized by everyone locally. People know what "marriage" means. They don't necessarily get that a "domestic partnership" means the same thing. My partner and I once went into a gym to buy a membership. They offered memberships for married couples, and for singles. When we said we wanted the same price as the married couple, they wouldn't give it to us. "Domestic partnerships aren't the same," they told us.

As for folks who struggle with this on the religious side of things, I think it's worth pointing out that even among biblical scholars there's disagreement over what Leviticus 18:22 means. It bothers me that so many conservatives are willing to point to the bible to say that homosexuality is wrong, when there are a great many other things, such as having intercourse during a woman's menses, the eating of pork and shellfish, and the wearing of wool and linen together that are also mentioned as sinful.

And too, we have to remember that our country was founded on the principle of the separation between church and state. If we forget that, then I think our country sinks to the level of certain Arab countries where no other religions are allowed to exist.

Anyway, I'm sure you get the picture. But again, that's not what this blog is really supposed to be about. This blog is really about weight loss, and the fact that I'm queer is really incidental to my weight loss journey.

As for why I'm sticking to 1,000 to 1,200 calories as my daily goal, it boils down to one thing -- if I eat more, I don't lose weight. I'm a shorty (only 5'2") with a lousy metabolism, and eating more food means that I simply won't lose an ounce. Perhaps when I lose more weight and exercise becomes easier, I'll be able to exercise my way into a higher calorie intake. For now, though, I have to do what I have to do to get some of those pounds off.

Right now, if I tried to go jogging, the city government would likely sue me for the cost of road repairs. I'd most certainly end up jogging sink holes into the sidewalk.


Tigerlilly said...

1000-1200 is probably the perfect calorie count for you. I am 5'6" and have to stay between 1250-1450.

As for jogging...dont! Start off walking. Your body will burn just as many, if not more, calories if you walk at a fast pace...without the damage to your knees (or the street, LMAO!!) Eventually you will lose more weight and start feeling stronger and will want to add a little jog here and there!

I have summed up my plateau to over eating. My portions have been normal (i.e. SUPERSIZED) and I need to shrink them down to diet size (ie. kids portions). Hopefully this will kickstart my loss again.

Thanks for commenting! (congrats on the marriage by the way!)

Blossom said...

If I could vote for that prop, I would! (I'm in Toronto; we've had gay marriage legalized for a while now). I'm glad you were able to marry the love of your life. As for the exercise, just start off gradually; we all need to work our way up!

Mattie said...

Okay, here's another suggestion...

break up your three meals into six meals. That might really help a lot. For example, if you make a tuna sandwich for lunch, eat half at lunchtime and the other half 2 hours later.

If you break down your 3 meals and 2 snacks down, then you'll be eating approximately every 2 hours. It will be the same amount of calories (etc) but your metabolism will be expecting to be satisfied more evenly across the board.

Sheesh. I don't know if I said that all right. If not, ask me and I'll try to clear up the mud.

Once Upon A Dieter said...

Hey, girl, I thought you were female, then thought, maybe I'm wrong. :) Your "voice" on the blog is a woman's voice in my ear. It was "the wife" thing that threw me off.

And as one of those conservative Christian people, just want to let you know that I do wish your family well, and I understand your POV. I may not agree with it all, but then, what's new? No one agrees with almost anyone 100%. We had a long-term gay couple (cousin of mine and his Dutch emigre spouse) until the spouse died a few years ago. They were together 33+ years, and they were the epitome of a devoted couple. Lasted longer than plenty of straight marriages I've seen. I was glad my cuz was able to be by his spouse's side during the hospital ICU times. It would be awful to be denied entrance to you partner or, well, anyone you love. and I think it's WRONG to keep ANYONE that is a loved one away. I don't get this "immediate family" crap, anyway. What if the person I most cared about was my best friend (of any gender)? Why shouldn't the people I love be there to comfort me, help me, wipe my dang butt!?

On to the diet stuff:It's a bitch having the damaged metabolism. I've seen it happen a lot, especially after VLCD's. And when I look at how much one can eat to maintain a lower weight, it's scary. It's like being on a diet FOREVER. which, okay, I guess it is that, and there's no way around it other than to just give in.

Some gals I know did some metabolism repair by doing that very slow increase of calories and using certain foods. If I find their posts on it, I'll link up. It's low-carb, yes, and it uses healthy fats and supplements, but the process requires a lot of patience, I gather. Sucks.

If what you need is 1000 to 1200, then so be it. But don't go under 1000 if you can lose at that. It may only encourage the body to go back into famine mode and mess up the metabo even more.