Thursday, March 20, 2008

I am a Frickin' Yo Yo

Part of it is because of my weight. It's up, it's down, it's up, it's down again... This morning it was up, yesterday down. It's all within 10 pounds of my lowest weight, so I'm not panicking, yet, but I am unhappy.

What's weird is it doesn't seem to matter what I eat. I can be good and put on five pounds. I can be terribly naughty and put on two, or lose three. It makes no sense.

Last night, we decided to go out to dinner. We are very broke right now, but decided to spend a very generous holiday gift certificate we'd received at a local Japanese restaurant. We had appetizers, sushi, tempura, sake, you name it. We made pigs of ourselves, and it only cost $1 above the limit of the gift certificate, plus what we left as a tip. My weight, of course, was up this morning.

It's hard to care right now, though, because I feel like I have several much bigger fish to fry.

Those fish involve:
  • Ongoing problems with The Kid
  • Ongoing problems with The Job
  • Ongoing problems with The Spouse
And of course each of these problems creates its own set of sub-problems:
  • Ongoing problems with The Kid
    • Hassling with social workers, lawyers and court officials
    • Having to miss lots of work to attend unnecessary meetings
    • Fights over every day stupid things like school, chores, and life, the universe and everything else
    • Stress, stress, and more stress

  • Ongoing problems with The Job
    • Struggles with managing (and getting customers to agree to) a fair workload
    • Negotiating contracts
    • Worries about whether or not The Spouse will be employed
    • Stress, stress and more stress

  • Ongoing problems with The Spouse
    • Squabbles about The Kid
    • Squabbles about The Job
    • Squabbles about money
    • Stress, stress and more stress
Seems like stress is a common theme, doesn't it?

I keep trying to be optimistic, and hoping things will soon be better, but much of the mess we've been slogging through with The Kid has been going on for months and there's no end in sight. And of course kid problems eventually spill over into the rest of our life, as evidenced by the job problems that are at least, in part, caused because of our inability to focus on (and sometimes attend) work.

Everything is connected, isn't it? You have problems with The Kid, and it starts to affect The Job, which in turn affects The Money, and pretty soon you are getting into fights with The Spouse, which in turn doesn't help the situation with The Kid, The Job or The Money.

And of course that in turn makes you really not feel like bothering with The Diet, because trying to figure out how many calories you have left after you are exhausted, broke, and bone tired just doesn't seem like much of a priority. And, since you are broke anyway, dinner is probably going to end up being macaroni and cheese instead of a plate of "delicious" steamed vegetables, when you can buy the generic macaroni several boxes to the dollar and those veggies you should eat cost four times as much.

So yeah, I am a frickin' yo-yo, and I almost don't care. Almost.

1 comment:

Lyn said...

Hey, I just found your blog. Hang in there! You'll get through the rough patches. Good luck with all the stresses. WIll check back to see how you're doing!